By: Luke Roberts
Every year, there is a day set aside that brings people rushing to stores and scavenging for the best ground-breaking deals offered at their local retailers. This day, known throughout the nation as “Black Friday,” kicks off the holiday season with overnight camps outside stores, people shoving you over to get to the doors first, and just plain chaos. Although many people claim to be “expert strategists” on the battlefield of shopping, no one ever truly knows what to expect once they begin this journey. Whether you are one of these so-called “expert strategists” or just someone looking to survive amidst crazy shoppers, here are some tips and tricks for everyone ready to partake in Black Friday and the joy, and sometimes pain, that it brings.
#1: Stand up to those Angry Mobs through a Rigorous Workout Plan
Black Friday tests both a person’s emotional and physical strength when they come across those angry people that want to push you around in order to get what they want. Bringing some buddies that have your back would be helpful, but sometimes it can feel like every man for himself. Making a workout plan weeks prior to Black Friday can be quite beneficial and can really be a confidence-booster when encountering those bullies near that one item you want. A two month diet would be great as well, but that seems near impossible considering there is Halloween and a Thanksgiving feast during that stretch (if you have to indulge some of this delicious food, at least make sure you do a couple push-ups after). But if you look healthy and develop some muscle, then that should intimidate everyone else in the store.
#2: Set up a Booby Trap While Camping Outside Store
Camping near a store’s entrance Thursday night is a smart idea to begin with, but there is something else you could do to make that experience a whole lot better: set up a booby trap. It may be hard to get up in the morning (as you probably didn’t get much sleep), but setting enough time aside to scare off some shoppers will be all worth it. Unless a store manager catches you, there should be no problem in having a little fun with pulling some pranks, such as placing an invisible wire along the doors or blasting some loud music from hidden speakers. Those are just some of an endless amount of creative ideas that can give you an advantage on those early shoppers.
#3: Negotiate an even BETTER Deal with a Store Manager
Once you find that one item that has finally fulfilled your dreams, don’t immediately settle for “90% off.” Make sure to grab the item, but go search for a store manager (although that may be hard with so many people packed in a store). If you miraculously do find him or her, make sure to impress them with that workout plan and any other cool stories about yourself. That could maybe convince them to sell that product even cheaper to you, although don’t get your hopes too high.
#4: Stay Calm and Don’t Panic
This is the most important tip regarding the chaos of not only Black Friday, but shopping in general. Don’t be like those panic-stricken shoppers that frantically try to grab everything they can get their hands on and throw it into their carts. Be calm and wary of your surroundings, and shop confidently “while also grabbing everything you can get your hands on and throwing it into your cart.” Black Friday will most certainly test your patience, but the best way to go about shopping is to relax and shop like a civilized person.
There it is. The complete guide for the tips and tricks you need to survive Black Friday and hopefully prove successful in your shopping career. Now go bring a buddy along and have fun.