Stacy Helps Another Lost Soul

Dear Stacy, Okay. So here’s the thing: I don’t know how to make any food, like at all. My mom’s been telling me I should start to make my own lunch, but I don’t know how. I literally cannot make a sandwich without making a mess and dropping most of the ingredients on the floor. It is all so confusing. I don’t know what I want to eat! My mom is the only one who knows that. And then the ice packs! When do I use one??? To make matters worse, I don’t even know where most of the food in my kitchen is…This is all really embarrassing and I can’t tell my mom. Advice?

Dear concerned lunch eater,

Making your own lunch is definitely a moment in each child’s life that turns them into an adult. Getting served food is way better than making it yourself. If this was not true then restaurants would be out of business. People are willing to pay money just so someone else makes and serves them their food. The first solution that I would give you is that you could pay your mom to make your lunch for you. However, this seems like not the simplest option because you probably do not have a steady income.

The best suggestion that I can come up with for you is, sadly, you are going to have to make your own food. So slap on your apron because I am about to take you to school.By school, I obviously mean the kitchen. To make a good lunch, there are four key components to make a good lunch. You have your healthy foods, carbs, a drink, and the main dish. Now since it is high school and most high schoolers have high metabolism, it is totally acceptable to replace the “healthy food” with a dessert of some kind. All of the items that I am suggesting can be found at your local grocery store.

Now let’s break down all four of these categories:

Healthy/dessert foods: To go with the basics, we have the apple. Red or green honestly doesn’t matter, but definitely have at least one apple. Honestly, you do not want to have too many fruits in one lunch because that could be dangerous to your health. Now since most of you are still reading this to find out good desserts, here you go: cookies, brownies, pies, cakes, cupcakes, mini cupcakes, and so many more. The only stipulation on dessert is that you have to eat your dessert last so you do not waste the taste by eating another food after it.

Carbs: Every good lunch has to have anywhere between “some” and “a lot of” carbs. Chips and crackers are the main source of carbs that you are going to want to eat. Any type of chip or cracker is fine. My personal favorite is Goldfish, but it is really up to you.  I do not want to tell what type of chip to eat because honestly that is a personal preference. My only suggestion is that you have a lot of chips or crackers. Whatever the serving size says, I would suggest that you triple it at the minimum. You want as many as possible because this is the best part of the meal.

Drink: This can range anywhere from water to whatever the opposite of water is (without being illegal for a high schooler to drink, of course). I would suggest a juice of some kind. Juicy Juice, Capri Sun, Minute Maid, or Kool-aid; whatever your heart desires. However, I would stick to these main juice companies because anything outside of these might be a little sketchy. I would suggest Capri Suns, but if you are self-conscious about your ability to get the straw into the little hole I would say steer clear of those.

Main dish: This is where the bulk of your packing time will take place. My first suggestion is to bring in any leftovers that you might have from dinner the night before. You can warm it up in the microwave, but plan accordingly because there is a really long line for those. Or you could eat it cold, which is not always a terrible option. If you do not have leftovers, I would suggest making a sandwich. As you stated that you do not know how to make one, prepare yourself because I am about to teach you. If you like PB&J, here is how to make that. You’ll need two pieces of bread, peanut butter, jelly, and maybe a fire extinguisher.  Put one piece of bread on the counter. Then take a knife and spread the peanut butter on the bread. Then do the same thing with the jelly. Finally, put the second piece of bread on top of the other pieces and boom, you’re golden. Now you are probably asking “what’s the fire extinguisher for?” Well the answer is that you never know what’s going to happen, so it is better to be safe than sorry.

If you take this advice, then I guarantee that you will be able to eat like a king/queen for the rest of your high school life. Personally I do not use an ice pack. I would say if you are wondering whether you need one or not just assume no.  

Best regards,